In the last few months, Manchester has rallied together online to support a quiet and timid figure, who is gradually evolving from a reticent recluse to become the newest figure on the Queer Alt scene. Though everyone has clubbed together to support Susan as she makes her first baby-steps into the nightlife, she has still never been to a party. So obviously it has fallen to Black and Blonde to throw one for her! But is Susan finally ready for her debut? Or is she more concerned about her missing cat and the monotony of her daily routine? Haus of Phag caught up with Susan for a chat
| || |
Haus: Have you really never been to a party?
Susan: Not since I was much younger, and certainly not to the calibre of party that I have seen via these Facebook images. I went to university when I was younger, but I didn't spend much time outside of the library, I had high hopes back then about who and what I would be come. A few failed relationships, and all that. But after I got my first cat, Meitzie, I could never really leave the house for too long at night, as it upset her. Poor soul. She's dead now. But I have another cat, so it's OK. Although I don't know where he is...
Haus: How old were you when you had your first drink?
Susan: I had a shandy on my eighteenth, but I've never been much of a drinker. I ventured out into the city centre in early October, but none of my internet friends were around unfortunately. However, I did go into the Canal Street and onto that boat bar place and spent the night cosyed up by the mirror drinking lager and limes. I guess you could call that 'new found confidence'.
Susan: I wish. All my neighbours on my street have partners. I've never really had a proper partner. I've always brushed it off as something that would tie me down... but you know, we'd all like to be in love, wouldn't we? Co-dependency can be quite comforting, unless you're a couple which isn't like that, but that's fine too. I don't know... Another cat lover would be... fine... It was kind of the whole reason I got online in the first place. I don't think I'd want that kind of life though... I enjoy my freedoms. I don't go to the church any more. It was full of these women and their men in their Sunday best. That's where I met Margaret and Beryl, and I'm sure you've seen that horrible video? I know Liquorice and Violet meant no harm by trying to find out more about me. Wouldn't you do your research? But like I said. No. Not love.
Haus: Do you think your cat will ever be returned to you?
Susan: I would hope so, but I'm not holding my breath. I still add extra cat food to his dish each day, so that if he comes back he has a large meal. Although it has started to rot.
Susan: Hoho. Make the most of my youthful skeleton, I guess. You know, when your hips go it's a nightmare. Sometimes I can barely get the soup from the bottom cupboard. Can you imagine how annoying that is? And the cold only makes it worse. But maybe I would re-do my 21st. My 21st was spent reading. It was 1986, one of my happier years. Maybe I should have started a club night when I was younger. The idea of having a party with these... creatures of the night is so exciting.
Haus: Have you ever met a drag queen?
Susan: No. I watch the Paul O'Grady show though. And obviously on the telly box you occasionally see men dressed as women for comedy sketches, but from what I understand, drag is now much more than performing gender? Or am I wrong?
Susan: Well. I usually get up around 6. I make a cup of tea. Put on some toast. Feed the cat. Eat the toast. Drink the tea. Have a sit. Depending on the day depends what happens. Now, usually, most mornings I go on my Toshiba and start my surfing. I love the Good Food webpage, and the ITV Player, they're good. But since being on Facebook I really like flicking through the pictures. I told Beryl how much I really enjoy looking at that Anna Phylactic, I think meeting her would be an absolute highlight. Imagine if people all had the freedom to express themselves in such a creative way on a daily basis? It's what I envisage as some sort of twenty-first century utopia. Anyway. After my surfing, lunch. Perhaps church, or a visit to the nighbours. There are these two boys who live next door, so if I have leftovers I'll sometimes take them over. Their mother moved to Spain with some man you see, and left the boys...I think they're 17 and 21, all alone in that house. They're nice boys. The house is a bit messy, but that's OK. And they always tell me if they see my silly kitty cat doing things he shouldn't be doing (like rolling on his belly in the road!) And they always take my bins out. I asked them if they ever went on the Gay Village, or to the Cha Cha, but I don't think its their cup of tea. They like those Call Of Duty games and that type of stuff... I don't know if they have jobs? We'll see. Oh yes. Sometimes I sport a little make-up myself. That usually comes after my cleaning. Nothing exicting. Sometimes I go to the cricket social on a Friday night, but it's my dream to go out out, like I never did when I was younger.
Haus: What advice would you most like to give to young people today?
Susan: Don't hold back. I did and it's bought me to a point of regret. I wish I had taken every opportunity that came my way, and not invested so much in the opinions of other people. I think we are all stars. That's what these queens have shown me.